Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Crashing the Chatterbox

     Lauren's new softball team is meeting up with a different level of play, and a couple weeks ago we had a tournament.  Lauren has worked so so hard these last couple months...practicing 5-7 days a week at HER request!   Mike's been taking her to the cages at least 3 days a week, again at her request.  We have been blown away by her dedication. 
     It was all put on the line when she got up to bat.  She had a few grounder for a hit, a caught fly ball to right field, and two...yes two...strikeouts on check swing called third strikes.  The crazy thing is, she's never in 8 years and about 12 softball seasons had these check swings.  She might swing and strike out, but she goes for it with gusto!  Lauren was furious with herself.
     At the end of this game with two called check-swing strikeouts, we got in the car and the flood gates burst with tears.  She was so angry with herself.  She was angry that she could get "caught" like that not once, but twice.  We had a great conversation and are looking forward to another chance this weekend.
      I thought so much about those words, "Twice, Mom?  Really?  How could I do that twice?"  How many times do I ask myself the same thing, but it's more like this, "I did it again?  How can I do that same thing again?  I just went over it and promised myself I wouldn't do it." 
      What is your again?  So often for me, it's not losing my cool at homework time or over rushing out the door, or getting pulled into the gossip or letting the house get out of control again, or far more serious like saying the wrong thing at the wrong time that I just can't take back and will stick in my girls' or students' hearts.  Those things cause negative self talk like crazy and cause havoc in my heart.  I know in my heart to give these frustrations and failures over to God and let Him change me from the inside, but I get stubborn and think I can fix it.  He loves when we give it up because He changes us and then He gets the glory where it's due. 
    There's a great book I've read called, Crash the Chatterbox by Steven Furtick.  It's so great about letting the Lord speak truth into our lives when we're doing nothing but running a marathon of negativity in our brains.  I love that I can be striking out nonstop, but God sees me as a homerun hitter on His team!

Friday, October 17, 2014

Seeing Light

     A friend shared this Facebook post with me yesterday. I was moved to tears for so many reasons.  First, the fact that this man is seeing light for the first time in 30 years is mind-blowing!  Watching him and his wife together is so beautiful.  Watching their intimacy as they pray and thank the Lord for the miracle is a gift.  Watching the doctors share their excitement is contagious.  Watching, watching, watching, and hearing...hearing what this man had to say moved me beyond the images on the screen.
     "I can see light, and we can go from here."  Oh man, I got choked up hearing him say these words knowing what he meant physically.  Taylor would be a different traveler if she had light perception.  The independence factor goes up exponentially!  AND, I thought of this.  Once we see the Light of Jesus, we can go from here.  That moment we see and know Jesus wherever we are, that's when we really get to move.  It doesn't make things perfect or easier, it just makes the journey brighter.  As Larry's wife says, "It's only going to get better." 
     I loved what the doctor says, "So the journey is just beginning.  This is Day 1."   I want my journey to keep seeing the LIGHT brighter and brighter and pointing others to that same Light!

Here's the address to view the full video...a MUST see!!!

Wednesday, October 1, 2014

Welcome to the Circus

     First Corinthians 13- The LOVE Chapter

     It isn't often that I write about my classroom.  I love my job! I love teaching part-time with the MOST AMAZING partner ever!  Susie grows me.  She and I make a great team.  We've done the team-teaching thing for over 13 years now.  We've taught together WAY longer than we've been on our own. We love seeing these kids transform each year.  This year's class is going to challenge us far beyond our limits.  I guess that's where God wants me so He can intervene.  I keep telling Lauren, where you're weak, He is strong.  I am guessing God wants ME to hear this lesson, much more so than Lauren cause boy do I need it!
     We've had a 3rd grader suspended (Really...not even kidding) for something awful...threatening the teachers.  (I was kind of glad it was Susie's day not mine ;0) )   We have had kids licking the glue sticks, smacking each other in the butt, our non-English students telling us about threats to him and his twin brother from other kids in our class.  Kids are gluing pieces of paper to their faces like mustaches.  We've had family meetings because of crying spells that start as soon as we meet our kids in line.  We've learned of divorces, parents killed in car accidents, fighting in the homes, couches and floors for beds, and the list goes on.  The crazy thing about all this is these kids are for real!  These are their lives.  I realize there's nothing I really can do but love on them the best I can, do the best I can to teach them the rigorous material we're responsible for (even though 9 out of 25 can't read above the 1st grade level), and again LOVE them!!!
      I've resorted to writing in Sharpie a little message each day because I find myself losing my mind daily.  I start each day with a High-Five, Handshake, or Hug but am often worn out early in the day.  I am also praying for each one of these kiddos before the day starts and wanting to go from desk to desk to pray specifics over them.  I am asking lots of people I know to pray for our class, for me to have supernatural insight and wisdom to get through to them.  It's going to be an interesting year and one that requires FAR more than me!!! 

P.S.  I'll never be a hand model!